"how to talk to new people"
"break the ice by asking them questions like where they studied at and what are they doing in life..."
Not that I am disapproving such tactics but often it is subjective because I can say factually that, not everyone is able to muster up that courage or found any to begin with.
Meeting strangers and befriending them is inevident in some phases of life. There can't possibly come a time where this group of friends you met during Pre-school will still be together until you turn white-haired, 70+ and hard of hearing. People change friends, meet new people, became friends and change again at a certain point in time.
Conversations and not small talks
Before social media existed, people go out to do an activity and meet new people and talk, like really hold a conversation and never once having a briskly action of the itching fingers running into the pocket or touching a smartphone.
When I was still in primary school, my way of getting around new people and then becoming best friends were an easy task for me, until my dad bought me a cellphone when I was 14. Ever since then, my expressive motor skills were affected and I could not talk to a person comfortably which is a very bad thing.
Yup, that is obvious to everybody right now. The constant distractions of screens lighting up, vibration or the tone of a text sounded distracts the attention.
I felt it myself.
I have no hatred over social media because I'm a supporter of it hence, this blog is created.
The comfort feeling of a stranger wanting to know more about you decreases as I grew up. From genuine conversations that was held for hours, comfortably, to "forced" communication over lunch or group meetings so as to understand each other better.
It doesn't grow beyond the "oh, which faculty are you before?", and the occasional coincidence celebrated, "omg, I was from that school too!!", which actually opened a common topic between but it was left to die after minutes into it.
So the mere knowing of a stranger-turned-into-friend starts and ends there. What kept it going? Constant meeting for school and lunching together that kept it going.
If I were to recognize genuine efforts, I rather close one eye and open the other to count the blessings of having made friends that I can sit together with in school, be in the same group with and lunch together after school. And who knows? Will the friendship grow from a school mate to a best friend where you can talk to with about anything under the sun and call out sometimes to go shopping and do anything that is not related to school?
Honestly, that thought seemed to have shove right to the back of my mind after the efforts recognized.
But occasionally when I meet a friend, I would still hope that they will have this effort.
Effort is like the sound of clapping - it requires two hands to clap.
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Yesterday and last few weeks back, I have a genuine experience of getting to know each other better and not for the sake of keep away awkwardness and drawing back to our phones, which made me happiest!