0144AM thoughts

And it is overwhelming me so much that I could not sleep.
Thinking this time round, how going back to school will be like? I feel it is like starting a fresh chapter. And at this point, it is important that this chapter of my life is written without any misspellings a.k.a mistakes. I used to fool around a lot in school and could not concentrate on my studies. I nearly flunk my O's and did not do very well for my poly and still managed to scrape through. As I think back, why could not I commit to studying and then get it over and done with with good grades? Today, good grades is not everything but understanding and knowing how to apply is important. I failed to understand the subjects that I have been studying these few years. Only proudest thing in education relation was that I got first in class for Geography, back when I was in Secondary school. I know I could study, just that I got to put in more effort and learn how to focus. 
Parents were supportive that I want to apply for university and get a degree. I took quite much time and thought into this decision and finally took up the courage to do it as I do not want to disappoint my parents and myself. I want my parents to be proud of me, because i used to cause a lot of troubles when I was young. 
What I am dedicated to do right now is to study hard and score all A's and do it right and not make regrets as this is the last phase to pursue a degree that is soon to be considered as an average qualification in Singapore. 
I fear of getting into the right group of friends all over again when I go to university. I have very little friends who I can really count on, depend on and trust on and share my problems with. 
Okay this is a very random post but I feel much better having to think it through while writing this. 
On the other hand, do not want to disturb my boyfriend as he is going through mission in Taiwan.
Eyes are getting heavier.
Nights and sweet dreams!